November 14, 2018
“The only way to overcome fear is to have courage.
Because you’re not going to get rid of fear. It’s not going to go away.
But it can overtake you. or you can overtake it.”
There’s a truth about life that some people refuse to accept—you have no control over many of the things that happen to you personally or on a national level. And many things you fear never happen. You cannot control every outcome in your life!
Here are some suggestions on how to overcome your fear of things you can’t control:
Determine what you can control.
There are many things in life you have zero control over. You can’t force your spouse to change, you can’t control the political and economic climate, and you can’t control how other people feel. All you can control is your effort and your attitude. When you put your energy into the things you can control, you’ll be much more effective.
Identify your fears.
Usually, the worst-case scenario isn’t as horrible as you might imagine. The stock market falls and you fear another catastrophic recession. When in reality is it only a “market correction.” You see violence in the media and feel it will be on your doorstep. Lets; face it. List your fears and then be realistic about them affecting you personally. Some fears are not justified, and some are real. In those cases, what influence can you have on the situation to avert that fear?
Concentrate on your influence.
You can’t force things to go your way. But you can have a strong influence. Good thoughtful planning many times prevents a bad outcome. When you have concerns about someone else’s choices, share your opinion, but only share it once. Don’t try to fix people who don’t want to be fixed.
Solving the problem
Replaying yesterday’s conversations in your head and dwelling on catastrophic outcomes isn’t helpful. But solving a problem is. Are you mulling over a situation or problem-solving? If you are seeking solutions, keep thinking about ways to prevent problems and increase your chances of success. If you keep rethinking the situation, do a “brain check!” Acknowledge that your thoughts aren’t helpful. Get involved in an activity that will distract you and get your brain focused on something more productive.
Create a stress management plan.
Exercising, eating healthy, participating in leisure activities and getting plenty of sleep are just a few key things you need to do to take care of yourself. Schedule time to engage in healthy stress relievers. Whether you enjoy yoga, or you want to spend time with friends, make time for those activities regardless of how busy you are.
Develop healthy affirmations.
Scientists estimate people have about 70,000 thoughts per day. Many of those thoughts incite feelings of self-doubt, fear, and discouragement.
Keeping a few positive healthy affirmations on hand can help combat negative thinking. With practice, you can train your brain to think differently. And you’ll begin to accept that while you can’t control every situation, you can control how you think, feel, and behave.
Feel better now?